Why are we unhappy?

(Excerpts from Pujya Sant Sri Asharamji Bapu’s Satsang)

People say, “I am unhappy. I am suffering.” But Vedanta asks, ‘What is the weight of sorrow? Does the sorrow weigh 50 gm, 200gm, 500 gm, or 1 kg? Has anyone measured the mass of sorrow? What is the color of sorrow? What is the form of unhappiness? What is the force of sorrow?’ It has no force of its own. Nobody has seen sorrow having any mass, color, form or power. God has no sorrow to give to us. We don’t want unhappiness. Still, we are suffering. God has not created sorrow nor has nature done so. Does the mother create sorrow for her child? No! Why then do children become unhappy? It is due to lack of understanding. Going to school is for the benefit of children but they are unhappy being sent to school; only due to lack of good sense. Bathing is good for health; soap washes the dirt away but children cry when mother bathes them. Unhappiness has no mass, color, form or force, other than lack of good sense.

There are two types of Creation. One is the Creation of God. There is no sorrow in it. The other is our (mental) creation. We create it due to our foolishness. Diamonds, pearls, rubies are created by God. But one becomes unhappy thinking, ‘He has diamonds, pearls and rubies. I don’t have.” But the one who has them will also die leaving the gems and jewels behind. If you will have them you too will have to depart leaving them behind. Right now, you should thank God almighty for giving food and shelter. What if you have the stones and what if you don’t? The one who possesses them feels proud, “I have diamonds, pearls and rubies.” He is ensnared by egotism and you are ensnared by foolish envious thinking. The diamonds created by God do not cause pain to anybody nor do they give joy to anybody. God has created diverse forms, colors and events for your joy, your knowledge, and enhancing your divine love. After birth you came in your mother’s lap. Neither your mother nor father nor grandfather made the milk. Mother ate rotis and vegetables but God made milk for you in mother’s body before your birth. You suckled it as and when you wished and then turned your face away. It is not considered to be defiled; it needs neither boiling nor storing in a refrigerator. Had it been too sweet, it would have caused hyperglycemia; had it been tasteless, you would not have liked it. Had it been too hot, it would have burnt your tongue; had it been too cold, it would have aggravated Vata. Neither much cold nor much hot, neither much sweet nor tasteless. The excellent and healthful drink! Was it made by any insentient machine or Supreme Consciousness? Was it made by any enemy or Supreme benefactor? No, it was made by the Supreme Lord, the supreme well-wisher and friend of all; and it was made out of compassion with great care and attention.

When God brings favorable circumstances in life, it is to encourage us. And when, at times, He brings adversities in our life, it is to caution against becoming haughty. He gives illness to teach us not to be unrestrained in diet. He gives us health to serve mankind and to engage ourselves in devotional practices or to know Him. So tell me whether God causes pain to us or elevates us; God is our well wisher or enemy? He is our well-wisher not enemy. God wants our progress, He is our well-wisher, and we also want to progress for our good yet why the sorrow? Why the unhappiness? The reason is that we don't accept God's will. We want God to fulfill our wishes. You see palaces, mansions and gardens in a movie. But if the viewer wants to keep on viewing a scene forever! No, the scene will go and others - of roads, thieves, dacoit, good people, dancers, and lovers - will come. All these are ever-changing scenes of the cinema. If somebody wants to keep a particular scene stationary or to prevent some scene one does not like, it is not possible. If somebody wants a particular scene to go away, it is not possible. You cannot keep any scene stationary or prevent any scene or change a scene at your will. This is only a film for your amusement, entertainment or education.

Likewise, God has made Shastras; He has prescribed paths of Jnana, Bhakti and Karma. God wants our well-being. If we view films, deceive others or do other unworthy things like drinking, gambling, slandering, are not we ourselves sowing the seeds of misery?

So sorrow is formless, weightless and colorless. Unhappiness is the other name for foolishness, it is the lack of good sense, of insistence.

Somebody dies. His death does not make you unhappy or sad. It is the feeling of ‘he is my relative…’ that makes you sad. Birth of a person does not give happiness by itself. It is the belief ‘a son or daughter is born to me’ that gives you joy. We take the body as ‘I’ and the things and persons related to the body as ‘mine’. But if we take the Self, the Supreme Self from where the ‘I’ arises as ‘mine’ and the world as a dream and conduct ourselves in the world judiciously, there is happiness and bliss all the way. ‘These are my diamonds. These are my pearls. This is my house…’ They were possessed by someone else in the past and will be possessed by some other person in the future. The land which you believe to be yours belonged to somebody else before it became yours. And when you die or may be before that its ownership will pass on to somebody else. So do these things actually belong to me? No. You may believe them to be yours superficially, but know within that all this is but a dream and the One Who ‘knows’ it i.e. God alone is mine. He is mine who does not leave my company even after death. This realization leads to perennial bliss.

So dear ones, God did not create sorrow! Neither was it created by nature, brother! Attachment-aversion, ignorance, egoism are the causes of sorrow. Ignorance will be removed by the knowledge of essence, attachment-aversion will be eliminated by worshipping the Lord, by meditation. That’s all, your love for Lord is accomplished and attainment of the Supreme bliss is done.

God did not create unhappiness and you too don’t want it. Unhappiness is the second name for foolishness and it can be eliminated with the help of satsang, for satsang awakens discrimination.

‘Wisdom dawns not without association with the saints and such communion cannot be easily enjoyed without the grace of Lord Rama.’

(Sri Ramacharitamanasa Bala-Kanda: 2.4)

One gets human birth with the simplest grace of God. One gets faith and a Guru with special grace of God. With more divine grace one gets initiated into Guru Mantra and love for the Lord is kindled in one’s heart. Divine love will lead sooner or later to the divine Knowledge also.

Your Self is eternal and immortal.

‘The individual soul is a part of God, immortal, conscious, untainted by illusion and by nature perfectly blissful.’

(Sri Ramacharitamanasa Uttar Kanda: 116.1)

You are blissful by your very nature but these visitors – worries, passions and beliefs etc. – make you unhappy. You do not want sorrow; and it is not created by God or Maya or nature. Unhappiness is on account of ignorance. Don’t intensify your pains and sorrows thinking yourself to be miserable or suffering. ‘The mind is afflicted with unhappiness; the body is afflicted with the pain; I am the Immortal son of God, the Knower of all.’ – Thus Self-enquiry can eliminate your pains and sorrows.

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